jUnGLe jUiCE

So....Japanese farmers have started growing square watermelons since the round ones take up so much room in the refrigerator. However, looking at these gigantic square watermelons doesn't exactly say 'takes up less room' to me but it DOES say 'perfect container for jungle juice.' No more worries about having the watermelon roll over on its side spillin' "the juice."

HooTMaiL

I'm going to start a new email server called hootmail.com. You can only send funny things through it. The filter will throw all non-funny things away.

I aM tiReD oF tHEsE...

hEaRd iT. LovEd iT.

Fear is the darkroom where the devil develops his negatives.

i'M iN a nEw yORk sTaTE oF miND

I went to New York for the first time ever this weekend. Here are my stories/observations:

1. The second we got out of the cab when we arrived, this homeless guy made a spitting sound to my friend and said the following: "Dirty Whore. Why don't you just stand there and get raped." Ha! When she asked him what his problem was, he screamed "you're the problem." She looked pretty slutty in her pumas, jeans and hoodie. Oh wait, not so much. But nontheless, it was super hysterical. So we spent the rest of the weekend calling her a dirty whore.
2. One hungover morning we went to go eat lunch at a restaurant that...(wait for it)...served ONLY Macaroni & Cheese. Talk about my dream come true. Any city that has its own Mac & Cheese restaurant has got my vote.
3. Caramel Crunch Bars taste good in NY too.
4. I wanted to see a celebrity and/or a rat. To me, that says New York. What did I see? A turtle.
5. Dinosaur bones are freakin' cool.
6. I met Chusher. For those of you don't know, he's the Chinese Usher.